What is more annoying than someone who just sits around and pulls business jargon phrases out of the air? You know the person who just uses some popular buzz word to make themselves sound smarter. Well news flash we’ve found a translator that can take these phrases and put them into honest English. I got …
Category Archive: Work
Apr 19
Feeding Time
After much anticipation here is the 3rd installment of the song parody related to slob here at work. Inspired by the real life situation, More than a King Hippo aka Goodyear (the blimp) *Listen to this inconjunction with Closing Time by Semisonic Feeding Time Open all the stores and let my eating unfurl Feeding Time …
Nov 09
Enter Fatman
If you’re a fan of the site then clearly you remember the post Chips Forever Meng. Of course these song parodies are inspired by the real life situation, King Chippo…. *PLEASE READ THIS ARTICLE IN CONJUNCTION WITH “ENTER SANDMAN BY METALLICA Say your prayers little Chips Don’t forget the dip Goin’ straight to my hips …
Oct 26
Reply To All
Quite possibly the worst idea of all time has been the ‘Reply to All’ function on emails. It brings nothing to the table but trouble. Or in the case of where I work, stupidity… In less than a calendar year I’ve been witness to some of the biggest morons around abusing this feature. Let’s dig into …
Aug 23
The Baby Quake
As we all know by now there was an “earthquake” that tickled the East Coast today. According to reports I’ve seen online the epicenter was a 5.8 or so with tremors reaching from 2.5 to 3.5 depending on the proximity. I’m essentially 10 miles from New York City, and NYC is easily 250 miles from …
Aug 22
Don’t F With My Caffeine
There are a few simples rules that the world needs to abide by when it comes to dealing with me. 1. Don’t get in the way of my morning Starbucks 2. Don’t deny me a constant and steady supply of Red Bull. Am I a caffeine junky? Yes, I think that’s a fair assessment. Guilty …
Aug 05
Chips Forever Meng
Inspired by the real life situation, More than a King Hippo…. *PLEASE READ THIS ARTICLE IN CONJUNCTION WITH “FOREVER BY DRAKE” It may not mean nothing to y’all Understand nothing was done for me So I don’t plan on stopping at all I want these chips forever man, ever man, ever man I’m shutting shit down …
Jun 27
Business Gospel
12 Signs your company is being run by “arrogance” 1. You hire and develop great people but then fail to listen to their input if it is nonconformist thinking. 2. Your company rationalizes its mistakes instead of learning from them. 3. Your company focuses almost exclusively on financial success with little regard for legacy and …
Jan 20
Curb Your Stupidity
An additional 15% of my work comes from covering up from other’s computer and business inadequacies. And myself being the company ‘excel guru’ only means that I have to explain auto-filters, data sorts and pivot tables to archaic IBM style workers. They have the book Excel for Dummies but I think they would have to …
Aug 09
What I’ve learned working in Corporate Finance
Lesson 1: A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower, when the doorbell rings. The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next-door neighbor. Before she says a word, Bob says, ‘I’ll give you $800 …
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