Trash or Treasure – Part 3

I decided to do some Internet trash diving this morning and I might have found my biggest item to date.  Think of this series like River Monsters but with crap online…

Now if you had $10 what would you do with it?  Okay I’m hearing buy lunch, buy beer, use towards gas…I didn’t hear anyone say they wanted an extra goofy, ill-fitting Albert Pujols photograph t-shirt? 

I mean wow, wow wow.  WOW.  Can you imagine someone actually wearing this?  The answer is yes.  It will be some kid in high school or junior college who is socially awkward, likes the Lord of the Rings movies, collects Star Wars cups and feverishly knows everything about the WWE and at minimum is an XXL.  I mean wow, holy shit is this the worst t-shirt you’ve ever seen your life? 

Even the “urban” scene that leans towards some let’s just say different style shirts wouldn’t wear this non-sense.  And the balls to have this regular priced at $35!!! Are you kidding me?  I could name 35,000 things I would buy before that shirt at that price.  Even $9.99 it’s a fucking rip-off.  I would maybe pay 20 cents and that’s if and only if I could scrounge up 4 nickels.  I wouldn’t even include a dime to buy that shirt, it wouldn’t be worth it.

What makes it great, besides the fact that Pujols isn’t on the St. Louis Cardinals anymore, there are more shirts with different players on them! And some of those are on sale for $19.99.  So if you want one with Jeter, A-Rod or Ryan Howard you’re in luck.  Just go to Eastbay and check out the Outlet section. (Btw Eastbay is awesome, I love their site I’ve probably spend thousands there over the years on basketball shoes; this isn’t meant to knock on them just the manufactuer of this particular product)

Ahh but it get’s better.  Thanks to http://www.eastbay.com/ they have a wonderful system where you can actually review products and leave your comments.  This item has 6 comments…Every review gave it 5 out of 5 stars.  This is incredible, this country is going to hell quicker than we thought.  Fucking Mayans you’re so smart, so smart you are…

Some douche from Sacramento said they bought this for their kid (description I’m sure matches from above) and states it is comfortable and has cool graphics. They also think that Walmart steaks are better than Morton’s and that the VCR is superior to any Blu-Ray player out there.  

Some other clown wrote ”like being up close and person with a player”.  Nevermind the grammar clearly this person is an illiterate moron but what type of sociopath would actually write that? Is this Robert DeNiro’s son from The Fan?

Another person wrote their boyfriend was so pleased with this shirt (probably because it gave him a reason to dump you), and finally yet another person wrote they got at least 20 compliments on the shirt and people asked where they got it.  I’m sure people asked so they could call the company and ask them to shut down operations because it’s for the benefit of mankind.